I have a white wine hangover and too much aftershave on

In addition to showing up late and hungover, I'm 80% sure that I have way too much aftershave / cologne on. To put the muthafuggin' icing on the cake, I didn't have time to fully shave so I have the Mario Batali shitty double chin beard going on.

Although I'm generally pro-Grease, the punniness is gett a little cloying as of late.